Beta

http://www.fitocracy.com/knowledge/rage-box-training-with-rafe-brox/

I am one of the pilot participants in Fitocracy’s online coaching program, so if you want to get my brains-on advice to whip your ass into shape in the tender, loving, and inexorably enabling way you’d expect from Yours Truly[1], they’re offering my services at a bargain introductory rate, with the beatings to commence on February 17th.

If you or someone you know is terrified in a good way of giving this a try, feel free. I won’t be crueler or kinder to friends, frienemies, or total strangers.

[1] Which is to say, if you say you want to accomplish something, I will not let you give up. I am a right fucking bastard like that.

Until the Cut

So, that was informative, if not entirely awesome. No burying the lede here: I go in for surgery on Monday, 9/9. My pre-op consult is Friday, 9/6.

Pictures of this week’s non-shit lifts and other stuff under the cut.
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Breakfast Mush

There’s this thing that happens when your friends know you “do fitness stuff”. It’s akin to the Pickup Truck Call, in that you’re top-of-mind when it comes to moving things, especially large, awkward, or heavy things. This is expected and, usually, fairly entertaining, because there’s usually food and stuff as thanks, plus… hey, free bonus exercise. :-)

There’s also the inevitable wallpapering of stuff that captures social media mindshare, which Oatmeal’s treatise on running did when he posted it recently.

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Rush Limbaugh is a fat, stupid, lying sack of shit

I figure that headline has better SEO than “Sky blue, water wet.”

It seems the ubiquitous blowhard has finally stuck his dick into my meat-grinder by suggesting that exercise, and the folks who engage in it, are burdensome on the American health care system.

All you exercise freaks, you’re the ones putting stress on the health care system.” – Rush Limbaugh, 2009

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T totalling

Some things are easy to gauge — strength and endurance and weight — because we have the tools at our disposal to measure them. Other things are trickier — sleep quality, or various nutritional balances — but still within the realm of doable for someone who is attentive and attuned to how their body works. But for some things, there’s no real substitute for professional diagnostics and evaluation.

And this brings us to today’s subject, which is going to come as something of a surprise to most readers.

Your not so humble scribe has what has somewhat coyly become known as “Low T.”

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Ten Percent Better; That’s Like Going to Eleven, Right?

So, here we are:
Age: 38 (as of end of July)
BW: 170-175
BF%: 12-13

Good lifts:
Bench: 255 (+15)
Squat: 350 (+35)
OHP: 160 (+25)
Dead: 455 (+30)

Under ideal conditions (smart headspace, spotter, etc), I’m pretty sure those would be 265-275, 365, 165, and 465-475, but I’m stronger all the way around than I was when I started with Josh (12 weeks ago) by about 10%.

Measurements with the tape will be done tomorrow.

Nemesis

Bad Horse

“I’m an easy thing to hurt yourself against.”

– Uisgebaugh, Blood and Iron (Elizabeth Bear)

I joke with an old friend (that is, a friend of long acquaintance, not one of advanced years. She is STILL twenty-nine, some-fucking-how) about being her “sexy nemesis,” because I don’t pull any rhetorical punches in our friendship, and gleefully fuck with her when I think she’s getting too complacent.

This is my standard modus operandi in many things; my younger, more pretentious self wrote a first-person essay from Satan’s POV about trafficking in doubt, for instance. Be that as it may, presenting a challenge, an obstacle, or a target is something I tend to do whether I mean to or not.

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Lagniappe

I’m going to quote one of my other blogs for a moment here.

Lagniappe: A small gift given to a customer by a merchant. Basically, “a little something extra.”

Cheap Philosophy: The extra mile is always paved with broken glass, and it’s full of potholes.

In that context, I was bitching, but it occurred to me today that, in a very real sense, the “+” in my workout regimen is also a bit of lagniappe, and, at the time it’s taking place, it sucks a fair bit. However, there is a very immediate reward, especially when that little something extra turns into a PR. If that’s not an incentive that someone can get behind, I’m not sure what other carrots can be dangled in front of them. I think it’s pretty fucking cool to be better today than I was yesterday, and be better tomorrow than I am today.

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Not quite getting the hang of a Thursday*

15/9/3+ Overhead Press

While being terribly, frustratingly busy at the office is good for taking a late lunch (and, even at 3pm, there were folks in the office gym, somewhat surprisingly), it didn’t make for a particularly thrilling workout  – half an hour on the fairly-evil “cross country” program on the Precor elliptical.

After work, there was one moment of respite – the softball game got rained out, so we didn’t have to get our asses handed to us by a team with no business being in our league. Thus, I could get in my OHP workout without compromising my already compromised performance.

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Coworker Challenge XIII

Another well-attended go-round this month, with a bit of old school returning – back to the two minute squat event, instead of the 50 squat-thrust race. There was general mutiny at the suggestion of doing 50 burpees with a pushup at the bottom.

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