I am one of the pilot participants in Fitocracy’s online coaching program, so if you want to get my brains-on advice to whip your ass into shape in the tender, loving, and inexorably enabling way you’d expect from Yours Truly[1], they’re offering my services at a bargain introductory rate, with the beatings to commence on February 17th.

If you or someone you know is terrified in a good way of giving this a try, feel free. I won’t be crueler or kinder to friends, frienemies, or total strangers.

[1] Which is to say, if you say you want to accomplish something, I will not let you give up. I am a right fucking bastard like that.


So, after some entertaining yoga with a local friend, and helping her test her OHP, Bench, and Deadlift out, as well as show her some kettlebell basics, I wanted to do some strength work of my own. I had hoped to have my new plan in hand today, but it’s the holiday weekend and I only got my 1RM info to my coach the day before yesterday; I should have it soon and will begin attacking it presently.

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February Fotos

Sue me, I just got done with a two-hour upper body workout, followed by some heavy logistics planning for hypothetical renovations; clever titular wordsmithing is not in the goddamned cards at the moment.

Anyways, here’s the state of the meat seven weeks into the year.

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Coworker Challenge: March 2011

Name Weight Pullups Pushups Situps (2 min) Ball Toss (12#) Long Jump 40 Yd Dash Mile
Rafe 175 29 75 92 30’3″ 8’1″ 5.28 (PR) 6:23
Amy 1 50 (knee) 82 (PR) 19’3″ 6’10” (PR) 6.96 8:41 (PR)
Megan 27 29 12’8″ 5’8″ 7.31 10:05 (PR)
Paul 210 7 50 70 23’8″ 7’0.5″ 6.13 8:00 (PR)
Daniel 175 2 42 17’1″ 6’10” 5.81 9:46
Efrain 170 27 (PR) 57 61 (PR) 24’5.5″ 7’1″ 6.13 9:24 (PR)
JP 5 21’7″ (PR) 7’11” (PR) 6.19 (PR) 9:18 (PR)

Lots of PRs out there; Megan and Daniel were first-time participants, and Paul hadn’t done some of the new for 2011 events, or there might have been even more.

Valeria revisited


Her. Not the one up there.


Scaled to my weight (170-175#), the “Good” weights are like so:

Bench Press: 135

Pullups: 175 (with weight belt)

Deadlift: 245

EZ Curl: 65

Time (4/18/10): 7:13

Time (2/24/11): 5:06 No wonder it felt so much fucking harder this time – I did the deadlifts before the pullups by accident.

Video of this idiocy behind the cut.

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Smart answers to obvious questions

A reader asks:

“So, Sensei, what is the BEST way to burn fat when exercising?”

“Work hard.”


That is, at the bottom of it all, the truth (both my answer, and their rejoinder). Continue reading

CWC 2011

Here’s the list of events (weather permitting):

• Pullups
• Pushups
• Situps
• Medicine Ball Toss
• Standing Long Jump
• 50 Yard Dash
• 1 Mile Run

Note: We will not be doing thumb-extension presses as part of the new regime.

As you can see, we’re taking things up a notch for 2011, so we should all be freshly challenged in new and exicing (and, yes, probably unpleasant) ways. :-)

[WotD] Saturday, September 25

the "Ohio State Program" for bench p...

This is much, much more legible than my handwritten log. (Image by skyfaller on Flickr)

15/9/3 – Deadlift & Bench Press

A slightly different take than the “Dead Man Benching” routine from earlier in the week; rather than ramping up both exercises, the bench remained at a moderate load (~50% 1RM) for several high-rep sets.


Deadlift: 1×15 @ 135 / 1×10 @ 185 / 1×5 @ 225 / 1×5 @ 265

Bench Press: 2×15 @ 45 / 1×10 @ 95

Work Sets:

Deadlift: 3×5 @ 295 / 2×5 @ 315 / 3×3+3 @ 355 (PR)

Bench Press: 7×10 @ 125

Over and Under

I’m just going to assume the over/under on every Bills game this season is 9 points above whatever the opposing team’s average points per game is, since I think the boys in blue have a chance at coming in under 150 points scored this season unless they decide to play without a quarterback at all.

That bitching aside…

Lunchtime saw me working on my dips. I hate dips. Haaaaate. 2×10 sandwiched a 1×20, which sucked a lot. So did medicine-ball rolling my traps, rhomboids, delts and quads – interesting popping and crunching sensations ensue.

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[WotD] Dead Man Benching

This is one of the routines I’d inflict on Code Monkey every so often, so I thought I’d double up to get myself back in gear, despite the nagging cough of profound annoyance. I’ll be flipping this around next time, to be deadlifts with interstitial bench pressing.

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